When I wrote Let’s Talk about Fat, I decided I was going to be honest and open with my weight loss journey. I’ve got about 30 pounds to lose, which feels pretty significant to me, so I thought I would document the process. Today I want to talk about the victories and setbacks involved in the process of losing weight.
On Saturday after I got back from The Color Run I decided to step on the scale to see how I was doing. I try not to weigh myself first thing in the morning because I feel like that’s an artificial low. I want to know what I weigh for 98% of the day when I’ve got food in my stomach and am going about my day-to-day activities.
I was a little nervous stepping on the scale because with my busy schedule, I hadn’t gotten to work out with Jess that week. When the numbers came up, they read 168. I was ecstatic. I had lost 2 pounds in a week and a half.
I’ve done this by working out 3-5 times a week and not consuming sweets or alcoholic drinks unless it’s a special occasion. I’m not trying to cut a ton of calories, I’m just trying to be smarter about them, and make sure they’re full of lean protein, healthy fat, and whole grains. I stepped off the scale feeling pretty darn good about myself.
(Photo thanks to Jen.)
Flash forward to the blogger event a few hours later. There was pizza and cupcakes. I had some pizza because I needed lunch and I’m not one to hate on pizza. As I passed by the cupcakes I saw a red velvet cupcake and decided a few bites couldn’t hurt. I was doing good with my progress. I finished my pizza and had a few bites of the cupcake before throwing my plate away. As I walked past the cupcakes again I saw the carrot cake one and decided since I only had a few bites of the red velvet I might as well try the carrot cake too. I found myself eating the carrot cake cupcake and not really liking it. I’m very picky with carrot cake. Before I knew it though I had finished the carrot cake cupcake that I didn’t even like!
I was annoyed with myself but figured, whatever, life is too short to get upset over a cupcake.
Flash forward to the Journey tribute band concert. It was an outdoor concert so I knew there would be drinking. I just wasn’t prepared for all the desserts. I was a few drinks in when the snacks came out. There were (more!) cupcakes, chips, cookies, and popcorn. I ate some of all of them, and then went back for more. (Along with more booze.) It was such a fun night but I was left with such guilt. I had totally over-indulged.
Why can I never seem to enjoy sweets in moderation? Why does it have to be all or nothing?
Alexandra said something that really resonated with me during her presentation at FitBloggin’. She said when you make a less than stellar choice it doesn’t mean you had a bad day, it means you had a bad moment. Accept that moment for what it is, make your next moment a good one, and move on.
When I woke up Sunday, I decided to do just that. I went to Zumba and ate well the rest of the day.
Monday brought a new set of struggles. Junior League had an ice cream social for new members which not only meant being surrounded by desserts but also missing my Monday Zumba class to make the event. (Why can’t fruit and veggie socials be a thing?)
I never had to think this much about what I ate before. I’ve never struggled to maintain my size before. It’s annoying and frustrating and tiring, but it is what it is so I have to accept it. I’m never going to live in a perfect little bubble where I only eat healthy foods and perfectly proportioned meals. I’m blessed to have awesome friends and a fun social calendar. But that doesn’t mean I need to go buck wild every time I’m around sugar and sweets.
I need to practice better self control. And be better about enjoying things in moderation. I need to build healthy habits that stick with me for the long term. That’s the only way this weight loss thing is going to work (And last!).
Josh and I did three sets of Johnson and Johnson’s 7 minute workout after work on Monday, so even though I didn’t go to Zumba, I got a great workout in.
The workout made me feel less bad about having a mini ice cream from eCreamery at the JLO new member meeting. (Side note but seriously, how cute is this?)
I was able to enjoy my ice cream and not reach for the other sweets at the event, and I stuck to water instead of wine. I was proud of my moderate indulgence and hope I’ll be able to strike a better balance like this in the future.
Yelp is having a Friday event at a club with booze and food from local Omaha restaurants. Saturday I’ll be at the lake with a bunch of friends which means lots more food and temptations.
So that’s where I’m at this week. I lost two pounds, gained a whole lot of food guilt, and am struggling (and sometimes succeeding with) finding balance. We’ll see what the next few weeks bring.
Just a side note: please note I’m not sharing any of this to seek attention or ask for compliments. I just want to share my honest journey and figure the Internet can help keep me accountable. 😀
Questions of the Day: Are you trying to lose weight right now? What are some of your victories and setbacks lately? Do you have any tips for enjoying sweets in moderation?